greelin:

cyberuser:

i remember when i was 5 i used to take dancing lessons and there was this kid in 7th grade who’d make fun of me and call me “gay” but the jokes on him because i gave his younger cousin a handjob at camp so who’s gay now

i think you’re still technically gay

(Source: 1vm, via crystallized-teardrops)

equisollux:

zombiecthulu:

basedkuroko:

my friend is hiding under this bean bag in the library so he doesnt have to go to PE

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the only way you can see him is if you get on the floor behind the bean bag and see the light of his phone

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I bet he’s on Tumblr

I am

(Source: lolicutie, via placatory)

shipsnotdrugs:

so my friend and i were home alone and naturally we ordered a pizza

we had a simple request

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so when the doorbell rang we were super excited but our delivery person was this really confused old guy

he was like, “i’m sorry, but i don’t know what the heck a TARDIS is, so i drew the closest thing i could think of”

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he drew us a tortoise

god bless this man

i gave him a twenty and told him to keep the change

(via bleached-muffin)